


Chained to Him

by TheatricalBride



Series: Living in Sin [1]
Category: Negan - Fandom, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Bondage, Dom/sub, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Flirting, Friendship/Love, NSFW, Self-Denial, light exhibitionism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-07
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-15 13:04:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9236351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheatricalBride/pseuds/TheatricalBride
Summary: Reader is caught in feelings of self-doubt about how Negan really feels about her, and what he really sees in her as not just his best scavenger, but as a human being. One night will change everything, but is it for better, or for worse?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey all, I haven't written in a really long tim, but this was for a writing thingy on Tumblr coutesy of the blog @flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash! Please go follow her, she is super sweet! Anyway, here's this - I chose the prompt bondage and wanted to try something a little different ;)
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Being a favorite is often never easy. Be it a parent, a teacher, a lover … life before the plague wasn’t easy for me. My parents died before I turned three, and I was sent to foster care where I stayed until I was eighteen. I relied on my street smarts and common sense as well as my natural book smarts.  I fought for everything I could get in life and even then, someone was always in front of me farther because of favoritism. I never thought I could be anyone’s favorite …

When the plague hit, I managed to survive in a small group for a short time, but as hierarchy swayed, the group broke down, and I left them before I found myself dead. I soon learned of a group, the Saviors, not far where I abandoned my group. I knew this group was bad news, but in a time like this, anything I could do to survive was a necessity. Somehow, I ran into a few members out on a hunt in the forest one day. When I told them what I wanted, they couldn’t believe a girl like me could survive and scavenge in an environment like the one they worked in. Sure … I was curvier than the average girl they liked to screw behind the sheds, and in the showers after a good day’s hunt. I didn’t care for makeup and clothes and what they carried in their holsters. Once again, I was not the favorite candidate in their eyes to join them. They berated and mocked me as a “dog,” “hag,” and “fat cow.” In anger, I had enough of their vile words, and I pulled my gun out, ready to blast the leader of this group, with matted hair and a burned face, sky high for saying the shit he said to me.

And then he showed up…

“What the holy fuck is going on here?!”

His growl of a voice came from nowhere and the men’s skin tones went pale as they stood at attention. I turned slowly, lowering my gun halfway as I looked up wide-eyed to see their leader. A tall, masculine beast, cool and calm like a deadly thunderstorm on the horizon. His clothes were simple yet threatening; the leather jacket, black and blood-stained pants and boots, the crimson scarf. We practically matched that day as I glanced slightly down at my black quarter sleeve shirt and black cargo shorts, my red beaded choker wrapped around my neck.

He smiled at me, with the barb wire covered bat slung over his shoulder, and said “Hi…I’m Negan.”

And I felt my breath leave my body.

Upon asking me my name and who I was, I told him what I wanted – protection and guidance. I vowed I would work with them, scavenging and protecting the Sanctuary in any way I could. Negan didn’t ignore me or belittle me, but the way he looked at me was unlike the usual way people looked at me. I knew he was listening to everything I was saying, but it was as if he read my mind as well. It was as if he was looking into my soul to realize how much I needed to survive, how much I needed a home. He agreed regardless of his men’s pleas to not let me in, and he assigned me as a full time scavenger.

As time went on, Negan and I grew closer, first as allies, and then we became friends. He gave me assignments that could have been more appropriate for his men who have served him longer, but he trusted me with every task. He allowed me to be his right hand person, relaying any misgivings his men gave behind his back, but also his wives, in case any of them strayed from him. Once again, I was despised by most members of the Sanctuary, but in Negan’s eyes, I was his.

As his right hand person, Negan often let me into his quarters at night, discussing daily business as well as providing a confidant in him. But lately, I found our conversations become double sided in flirtation and innuendo. He always began it, and I followed, first as a way to humor him, thinking nothing more than that, especially since I was nothing more than a virgin. But soon, I began to feel something more within me. I began to feel attraction to this man. It began with dreams of he and I, his breath coursing through my veins, his touch on my intimate skin. I found myself in my room, late at night touching myself and pretending it was him. It got to the point where his recounts of dominating men, and killing “walkers” set my heart on fire, my eyes dilated to the point of total blackness. I didn’t care if he saw it, but there was one thing I was sure of. 

Negan was not one to express his heart openly. He hid behind a deadly smirk, a killing swagger that if crossed, you would end up with your skull beaten to a pulp by his Lucille. I couldn’t just let myself open up to him; he needed to make the first move before I could do or say anything. I established my place beside him, I wasn’t going to lose that over affairs of the heart if he did not return it. And he established it one fateful night…

It was a dreary night, slow for the guards out on the fence border, no moon or stars lit the sky. I was with Negan once again in his quarters, filling out paperwork of new members in the Sanctuary while he cleaned Lucille from a run in with “walkers” during a collection at Hilltop, along with sipping from a glass of whiskey.

                “You seem tense,” he said in a hushed tone.

My eyes fluttered from his voice in the broken silence, but I kept them down staring at the words in front of me. On top of many significant feelings, I had a rough run in that morning with some of the scavengers about a follow up on a supply run, and then an hour or so later, three of Negan’s wives accused me and cussed me out on cutting down their weekly toiletry supplies even after I explained they would be getting them next week. “I…I’ve got a lot on my mind,” I whispered.

                “The fuck could you possibly have on your mind-“

                “A lot!” I looked up and could tell he was shocked by my sharp and brash tone with which I responded back, “Sorry...but you realize that with my position I hold under you-“

                “ _With_ me, hun,” he corrected, “You don’t work _under_ me, you work _with_ me, yes?”

I sighed heavily and returned to filling out papers as I spoke, “Fine, _with_ you. Anyway, no matter the position, basically anyone dealing with you hates my guts. Your men think I am your snitch, and your wives basically think I suck your cock all day because I’m with you significantly more than all of them combined in one sitting. And frankly, I…”

I looked up and found him with that look again, deepening his gaze into me, trying to read my mind. I stopped myself from confronting him about our relationship. I remembered my promise to myself, _He must confess before you can confess._

I shook my head “Nevermind…I’m just venting about shit.”

Negan sighed out and I could tell he was frustrated. It was bad enough I could tell by his body mannerisms when he was in a certain mood, but now that I could tell his mood by the way he breathed, I was in deep. He stood up and hovered over me, hands on either side of the table spread.

                “Put the papers down, and look at me.”

My heart went straight into my stomach. I never heard this tone before in his voice, not just to me, but to anyone he spoke with. I slowly put the pen down and then the papers I held, and looked up to him. He was no more than a foot above me, our heads diagonal of each other. His jaw was tight, and his eyes were near black, a small hint of the natural hazel circled around.

                “Now, my _men_ , as you call them, are a bunch of sniveling shits who only follow my orders because they are gutless. They survive in fear because it’s carved into their puny skulls that once false move gets them a one-way ticket to Hell, without their brains intact.”

He began to pace in front of the table now, never taking his eyes from me, his hands moving about in emphasis. “They feel fuckin’ threatened by anyone stronger than they believe they fuckin’ are, and if it’s a woman, well god-fucking-damn, it’s the end of the world! They are scared shitless of you, darlin’ and you kicking ass and taking names doesn’t help them none in their minds.

                “That is their problem, and if they have a fucking problem, they can come to me and I’ll beat the fuckin’ sense back into their skulls and show them who’s boss…”

I gazed my eyes down and nodded, thinking he was done. I could feel the heat rising from my core and moving outward. The way he spoke not only in my defense, but defending his trust in me as his best person. It was thrilling, even erotic; I could feel my body tingle from the tension of it all. When I thought it was done, he moved slowly behind my chair, pacing again.

                “As for my _wives_ ,” he said, practically hissing the later word as if it was poison on his lips, “sure, I take care of them, I provide for them, and yes, I _fuck_ them to satisfy their needs. But you and I both know they came crawling to lil’ ole’ me for protection from the big bad world out there, cus they can’t get their manicured fingers and clean pure skin devoured by fuckin “walkers”. “

He was silent for a moment, and then out of nowhere, he placed his hands on my shoulders. His firm yet gentle grasp alarmed me, but when I went to move out of a flight response inside me, he kept me in place. I could feel his smirk, his eyes on me. If he couldn’t tell before how he made me squirm, he knew now in this physical form.

                “They don’t know what you know,” he said, his dark voice mixing with something else, “You are more aware of the world and what it holds. You are self-reliant, you know how to survive. What the fuck do they know? I respect them, yes, but I know they don’t respect you. I hear them talking about you, wishing you harm, wanting you dead… and it disgusts me…”

His hands tightened around me as his voice trailed off. What the hell was he trying to say? I closed my eyes and let out a sigh, but it came out a whimpering mess, moisture caressed my eyelids. I felt so wrong about this; I wanted him but did he actually really feel the same way? I could not take any more of what was happening.

With all my might within me, I pushed his hands off me and jumped from my chair. “I have to go!” I said with hesitant breath, and grabbing my sweater and bag from the table. “I have the pickup tomorrow with the guys, so-“

I was so fucking close to the door, so close to freedom and my hand wrapped around the knob. I cracked the door open, but it was slammed shut. He stood beside me, one arm holding his door shut. How he got from one end of the room to other that quickly amazed me, and I just stood there, as if I was a small mouse. Never before had I felt so helpless around Negan; it was pathetic in a scavenger point of view, but so utterly delicious in a submissive sense.

                “Don’t go,” he commanded gently.

My breath hitched in my throat; I swallowed and looked up to him. His face was so close to mine, especially since he had to bend down to be near me. I could smell the whisky gracing his breath, it was warm and sinful as it mixed with his rough, masculine scent.

                “Why?” I asked, trying to hide my anxiety, but failing miserably.

His smirk turned to a grin that could cut a concrete slab in two. He stepped from my already burst bubble of our comfort zones and chuckled. Backing off, he turned to grab his leather jacket from the couch.

                “You know I adore any and all women, right?”

I nodded, my heartbeat practically shaking in vibrations.

                “Well, as I said, I do care for my wives, in a way, like a-“

                “Contract,” I finished his sentence for him, “Yes I know, what are you getting at?”

                He laughed through his grin again and pulled on the jacket as he continued. “I’m simply saying that as a contract, one has to follow the rules, yes? Now there is one thing that, well, pretty much all my wives really fuckin’ hate for some damn reason.”

                “What’s that?” I asked, nervously playing with my red choker, the beads sliding around my fingertips. I was genuinely curious. Negan’s half-witted wives did anything he asked them to just so they could have clothes, makeup and even a bit of food. How could they possibly say “no” to him on anything?

                 “Well, maybe I am being a bit much in what I have asked my wives to … _participate_ in. But how would I ever know, if they won’t even try it? Now, that is where you come in…”

                He zipped his jacket and walked to the door. Opening it, he stepped through and moved his head for me to follow. He didn’t take Lucille with him, which was quite odd. We walked down the darkened hallways of the Main Building, each light dimmed to conserve energy at this hour. It made our walk more ominous as we went through. Opening a doorway, it led down a dark stairwell, lit only by a flickering light at the top stair. Letting me go first, I carefully held on the railing and he followed behind. The metal door slammed, scaring me half to death. My hand flew to my mouth, holding back a scream, but my voice still echoed.  
  
                Negan laughed under his breath, and began to walk down again, urging me forward. My legs were shaking, both from fear and pure anticipation. I walked at a steady pace, but my body trembled on the inside. Whenever he wanted something, he was more than blunt about it. This was not like him at all.

                “You’re sure are fuckin’ jumpy,” he commented, his voice now echoing in the stairwell. It made him sound like a god, or a demon, I wasn’t sure which was better in that moment, “What hell has gotten into you, I wonder?”

I stayed quiet. Honestly, words were not my strong suit right now. We finally reached the end of the stairs and came to another metal door, and I pushed it opened. It led to the outside, one of the grassy commons areas people used to practice fighting off “walkers” or have an outdoor lunch. Before I took another step, Negan brushed past me and suddenly grabbed my wrist. He led me out further over towards the metal fence. I looked up and around to see if anyone was out, or if we could be seen through any windows. All lights were out in the nearby buildings, and the closest watchtower was a good 200 feet away from where he was bringing me.

                “Come on,” I said, “what the hell is going on?” I tried pulling my wrist from his hold, but he sure as hell had a death grip on me.

Then, he threw me forward and anticipating to land on the ground, I held out my hands. I was met immediately with a hard surface – one of the cruddy old wooden tables. I sighed out breaths I had kept inside, and looking up, I was met with rusted silver bike chains scattered about.

My eyes went wide, and I turned back to him. The look in his eyes were that of a predator. It was a look of want and desire. A small curl of his lips foretold a secret locked within his mind, and his crossed arms possessed his dominance in this moment.

                “Negan…” I whispered, “what’s going on? What aren’t you telling me?”

                “Oh…” he purred, “I think there’s a hell of a lot we haven’t told each other…”

I leaned myself against the table, for stability and for staying grounded. He uncrossed his arms and slowly walked up to me. I cast my eyes downward that is until his chest was grazing my own. He brought his gloved hand under my chin, lifting my gaze up to his own.  


                “Now…what was that last thing you wanted to tell your boss in his office?” he asked, his voice sweet as poisoned honey.  
  
I just stood there, eyes wide, my lips quivering. Was all this really happening? Was I about to be punished in some form? “I…I just…” I tried to speak, but nothing came out. For the first time in my life, Negan silenced me.

He cocked an eyebrow, and grazed his tongue on his bottom lip. “You know, you’re really fuckin cute when your mind gets hazed with desire, darlin’” he drawled out.

I didn’t realize it at first, but Negan had begun to slowly, and carefully undress me. First was my sweater, unbuttoning each button slowly, and just savoring this moment. He had me right where he wanted me, and I couldn’t escape even if I tried.

                “You realize that for a while now, I have been making my interests known, haven’t you?” he asked, “Hell, I thought with all those late night conversations we had, about our desire, our secret pleasures, our past flings and shit … I can’t believe you didn’t ask for it sooner.”

                I swallowed hard and shook my head in disbelief. “No…how…how could you ever want me?” I asked honestly as I felt my sweater slide away along with my bag. “I am your scavenger, I bleed and kill for you, I don’t sit around trying to look pretty for you. Why would you even want this?”

Negan breathed out slowly and suddenly grabbed the back of my head. His lips crashed onto mine, as his other arm wrapped around my waist. I tried to cry out, to scream. My mind was screaming for him to stop, but my heart beat madly. His lips were warm and tender, soft and yet chapped on the edges. I could take the essence of his whiskey mingling with his natural taste. Slowly, I felt myself giving in. I lifted my hands to him, and grabbed his shoulders to steady myself from falling.

He moved his lips downward, along my jawline. He alternated between innocent pecks and long, sensual kisses. I could feel all around that he was marking me. For so long, he and I both knew that I would give my life for him, and now he was making my bond to him permanent. I couldn’t believe it if I tried, for now, my heart was screaming “yes!” to him. I let myself give in to the devil, and goddamn, I was falling down into sweet Hell.

                “Negan…oh Negan,” I moaned, like a wanton child.

He pulled away, and turned me around, my back now pressed against his chest. Then, he grabbed a fist full of my hair, craning my right ear towards his lips.

                “You want to know why I want you?” he growled into me. My skin went gooseflesh as his voice vibrated into my skull. I nodded furiously, whimpering.

                “Because…I know what I am about to do to you…you can take it more than anybody else…”

Suddenly, he let go but I was met with a cloth gag shoved into my lips and wrapped around my head. Then, a cord was wrapped around my wrists. I struggled nervously for a moment, but Negan quieted me before he began his ministrations again.

Negan continued to kiss me along my neck and around my ear. It took all the strengths inside me to keep standing as he nipped the sensitive flesh, being careful not to break my beaded choker. His lips and his scruff created an intoxicating cocktail, an aphrodisiac that only his wives could ever feel. His hands moved downward, grazing my covered breasts and my stomach before teasing the top of my cargo shorts. I hesitated not, my hips bucked forward once I felt his leather covered fingers caress my skin, giving full permission to give him access.

I felt him smile against me, and he slowly began to take me. He unbuttoned and then unzipped me, letting the shorts fall away. I could feel his breath suck in fast as his hand gently groped my ass. Maybe it was because I wore a very suggestive pair of underwear, a thin silken black fabric trimmed with lace-a pair I kept from my life before the plague. My legs buckled as I felt his touch, but he caught me on my forearms, and through the gag, I moaned desperately.

He then turned me around and helped me lie down along the table as he removed the shorts and boots from my feet. In my haze, it was the first time I looked into his eyes. They were practically black, and even though no form of light was in the sky this night, his eyes still blazed a sparkle of lust and desire. He gazed down at me and smiled his deadly smile, as if I was a prize he stole from one of our colonies. Chuckling, he reached down into his holster and pulled out something I didn’t see what it was until it flashed out, a slash crossing in the air.

It was his switchblade, the one he used on people who threatened to cross him. And I panicked, out of fear. Maybe he was actually punishing me, maybe he was lying to me and did want to kill me for what I knew not.

                “Now…” he said under his breath, “don’t struggle. I don’t want to clean up a mess of fuckin’ blood after…”

                In a moment, he brought the blade to my chest and slashed downward from chest to navel, making a clean cut on my shirt before tearing the rest from my body. Realizing his little game, my chest heaved as beads of sweat danced along my upper body. The bastard knew I was getting off from this, and he was relishing in my erotic fear of the whole situation. It was then, I felt I was so damn wet inside. I crossed my legs hoping to hide what I was giving off, but he knew…

                “Ah ah ah…” He put a hand to my knee to stop me. “You really think I don’t want to fuckin’ see that?” He chuckled darkly as he pulled my legs apart. “You have no goddamn clue what I will do to you soon.”

I moaned against the gag, and let my head fall back. I was in pure torment. Whatever he wanted to do, he had better do it soon before I melted into insanity.

I suddenly felt his strong arms lift me off the table, and carry me a short distance. I looked up and saw I was at the fence. He set me down not on the grass, but on a crate. He steadied me, making sure I could stand alone there before walking back to the table, grabbing the chains.

He set them on the ground in front of me, and taking one, he looked up at me. He removed the gag, and I allowed myself a deep breath before he spoke again.

                “All right…before I do this, we need to make an agreement.” His eyes bonded to mine, secretly praying for my permission. “You’ve never had this happen to you, and I haven’t done this outside of subduing animals we find, or assholes who can’t function during a hunt. You feel uncomfortable, or upset, or you can’t do it anymore, you _fucking_ _tell me_. Last thing I need is my best scavenger out for a week or more because I fucked this up. Got it?”

I processed what he said. He lived his life in contracts, in agreements, but this one was different. I could feel it inside me. There was a hint of worry mixed in with his gruff verbal exterior. I smiled gently, to reassure that whatever he did, I promised him that I wanted nothing more than pleasure and controlled pain.

                “Yes…” I whispered, “I got it, boss.”

His eyes flashed and he smiled.  He fucking loved it when I called him boss, even before all of this. I was more than sure to call him that if ever we were this intimate again.

As soon as the permission was given, he began to tie and lock me up in the chains, first my arms and wrists and then my calves and ankles. He spread me open like the Vitruvian man, my feet five inches off the crate. Suspended almost in the air was intoxicating, the cool metallic touch of the chains against my bare skin was blissful and uninhibited. It was so strange and yet so beautiful, knowing that we could be caught anymore was a threatening experience, but knowing I was with Negan, I was fearless.

Negan kicked the crate away, and admired his handy work. He cocked his eyebrow and smiled a tooth filled grin. “Damn,” he proclaimed, “you have no idea how fuckin’ hot you look right now…”

He walked up to me, breaking the barrier between us once again, his eyes now level with mine. “But I think there’s one thing missing…or rather, not missing.” The switchblade came out again and without breaking eye contact, he sliced away my bra and panties in less than a minute. My voice reduced to nothing but sighs and whimpers as I felt the cloth fall away and my flesh give into the air around me.

There I was; nothing covering me now from him. Never had I felt more vulnerable around Negan than the day we first met. I shivered as he brought the tip of the blade down and across my chest, tracing the outline of my curves, my rounded breasts, and grazing my hardening nipples. I closed my eyes and sunk into how good and evil the blade’s metallic kiss gave.  
  
I soon felt another kiss grazing my lips. Negan leaned in and caressed my lips with his, grasping my hands in his and pressing himself to me. The leather against my bare skin was so taboo. With each movement of my limbs, I was caught against the cold metal chains and the fence against my back. I could feel the blood leave my arms very slowly, but it mattered not. I didn’t care, I just wanted Negan to treat me as such and for it to never end!

As he deepened the kiss, he began to grind himself against me, his jeans pressing my thighs when a foreign touch caressed the inside thigh. I gasped out of the kiss realizing what it was, and even in the darkness of the night, I could see that his manhood began to rise, wanting release from its confines.  
  
We looked back into each other’s eyes at the same time, and I tilted my head, my eyes begging him for it. Negan chuckled and grasped the back of my head.

                “All in good time…” he whispered, “But first…I need to make sure you’re good and fuckin’ ready for me…”

He leaned back in and began suckling my neck, his lips and stubble made it difficult to stay quiet, but stifled my vocalizations to small whimpers in his ear. He slowly teased his fingers down my body, along my breasts and playing with my nipples. As his fingers moved down, so did his kisses. Down they went from my ribcage to my stomach, caressing each bit of soft plump flesh with fingertips and teeth. I was in pure bliss by the time he reached my core, and I didn’t realize what he was doing until a felt a sharp nip onto my clit.  


I gasped out loud, my voice echoing on the wind and my movement making the fence rattle. “Shhhhh…” Negan hushed, grabbing the fence to stop the noise, “Do you want the whole fuckin place to hear us?! You make any more noise and I end this…and I leave you without release tonight…”  
  
That last bit came out as a half threat and a half taunt. I was sure afraid that he would keep his word and end it, I had to be good for him, regardless of how much he decided to be a dick to me. I had so many nights where I was left unsatisfied at my hand, I wasn’t going to ruin this now that I had what I had dreamed about for months!

                “No…no, Sir!” I whispered anxiously, “Please, I will be good, I promise…”

                Negan growled against me, grazing my vaginal lips. “Mhmm, I fuckin’ love that you’re beggin’ for me…you’re always so tight, so hinged…let’s see how much more I can make you loosen up for me, yeah?”

I had no time to say anything, for in that instant, he began mouthing me. First circling his tongue over my clit and along my velvet walls, and then teasing me with his tongue into my precious cavity. As he sucked and caressed, I felt myself clench around him, my juice flowing like nectar onto him. He was so much more experienced, and yet, in my wanton state, I felt no embarrassment. He made me feel special as he devoured me, out in the open where anyone could see. And I didn’t even care…I let him suckle upon me until I finally came around his mouth with one swift fuck of his tongue.

I silently screamed out my orgasm until I felt Negan’s lips crash onto mine. As our tongues danced, I felt my cum on his face and mixed in his mouth. His kiss became beautifully salty, and I near swooned with delight as he shared my essence with me.

                “Negan please…” I whispered, wanting nothing more than to have him inside me now.

                He smiled into me, “Please what, darling?” His leather covered finger circling my clit and never taking his eyes from me. He teased me, knowing full well what we both wanted, but he thoroughly enjoyed how he could make me a blubbering mess.

                “Negan, please….please fuck me! Fuck me senseless, fuck me with all your passion and might.” I pulled at my restraints, making the chains rattle subtly. “Fuck me until I bleed…just fuck me and I will be yours forever…please!”

He was silent, and I thought with my confession, he would hate me forever for saying such nonsense only reserved for his wives. I softly let tears fall, thinking I made a fool of myself in front of him. But then, I felt his hand caress my hair, and his lips kiss my sweating forehead.  
  
                He growled out against me “Bout fuckin time you said it…” and then, in one fell swoop, he pushed all of himself inside me. I didn’t even realize he pulled himself out. I imagined every night in my bed how big he really was, but even just feeling it inside me, I couldn’t believe how big it truly was, far more girth than my two small fingers.  

I cried out, and he cupped a hand over my mouth. He set himself there, covering me with his whole body. He allowed me to get used to him, before I gave permission for him to go on. He started slow, holding me by my hand and wrist, his forehead never leaving mine. I closed my eyes as he moved inside me. I didn’t realize how wet I truly was for as he moved, he could slide so easily.

With each push, he grunted with each snap of his hips. “Agh…so tight…so fuckin’ tight for me…” he growled in my ear, “I forget…I forget what it’s like to…aghhh…to fuck a virgin…”

He began to quicken his pace, his leg pressed up onto the fence to gain more leverage to me, and the passes became stronger with each snap. He dropped his other hand and grasped my waist, bringing more stability as he moved. My voice became innocent whimpers, and I felt myself falling slowly away as the warmth in my core began to grow. I was close, I was so damn close to cumming again for him.

                “Negan…oh Negan, yes!” I mewled out, feeling the blood rush from all parts of my body straight to my core.

                “That’s it, darlin’” he growled out, “You’re so fuckin’ close, come on. Come on baby just a little more. Just…aggggghhh, just give in baby…”

He pumped himself faster and harder inside me, skin rubbing against skin. His dick a fiery red on top of my vaginal walls becoming raw from my first true sexual experience. Soon, the world began to spin, and all I could feel was him. Only him, inside and around me. Stars and blackness filled my eye sight, and my voice only sang his name as he finished me off. I gave two fucks in that moment whether or not people could see and hear us, right now, it was only us.  
  
I opened my eyes for one fleeting moment, and once I looked into his eyes, there was nothing but inky black. We were consumed in lust, and then, the world fell away as he whispered right in my ear “Cum for me!” A shrill scream came from my throat, and I convulsed, the chains rattling the fence…and I rested my head upon his shoulder, coming down from my final orgasm.

He stilled me in his grasp, caressing my wet hair and kissing my forehead. I was so delicate in that moment, something he wasn’t used to from me. Once we stilled our breaths, he pulled out of me and carefully let me recover. Once he readied himself, he moved the crate back, and began to unlock me from the fence. Upon taking the last chain off my arm, he took me off my standing position on the crate and carried me to the table. Regaining part of my consciousness, I began to dress with which he helped me when I needed it. I managed to put on my shorts, boots, and sweater and he helped tie and button everything up.

Then, he gave me everything that was cut up. Making sure I would be okay to walk, he led me back to the door we came out of to get here. “I…I’ll make sure you get some new clothes…those were _really_ nice and…I feel bad for cutting them,” he confessed.

                I giggled softly. “Thanks…you don’t have to, but thank you.”

We walked in silence for the rest of the time. I tried to make sense of what just happened in my mind. Did we really just have sex? Why did he do this? Was he proving a point like he was saying, or was he hiding it for something else? Finally, we reached my room, and neither of us knew the other did not want to say goodnight.

                “Well…” Negan said first, “I guess…I guess this is goodnight?” He sounded like the normal self he was, but his eyes told another story…

                “Yeah…” I said sadly, “I guess…goodnight?”

He nodded, not really sure what to do except walk away. I turned to the door, going to open it, but I stopped myself. I could not just leave this hanging like this, and if I did, I would be fucking kicking myself for the rest of my life…

I sighed out, turning back to him before he walked too far away. “Negan…” I said. He stopped and turned back to me.

                “Earlier … when you said your wives didn’t want to participate in… what we just did…” I stopped trying to find my words.

                “Yeah?” he whispered, walking back to me, closing the gap that separated us.

I took a deep breath. “Was that all an experiment for you…for them?” My eyes gave off a cold gentleness into his own. “Or…was that something else?”  
  
He didn’t speak, an odd action on his part. He just stared at me. He always knew what to say, but this time, I knew I silenced him. Then, he reached up and went to caress my cheek. I flinched away at first, but then, as the leather touched my skin, I leaned into it.

His softness was rare; he wasn’t even gentle like this with his wives. I felt honored that I could experience this gentleness from the beast.  


                “Do not compare yourself to my wives, darlin’,” he said firmly, “God knows I can’t abandon them…not yet at least. You even told me yourself the day I brought you here you had no interest in becoming a wife, and I respect that.”

I looked down, knowing what I believed to be the truth and wanting to cry. But then, he lifted my face back to his with both hands. I dropped the clothing from my hands, and grabbed his forearms wanting to pull away, but he kept me in place. He leaned in and kissed me so passionately, before letting go and pressing his forehead to mine.

                “But know…that if you ever change your mind…” his voice faltered for a moment as he tried to regain some kind of sense back in his thoughts, “If you ever decide differently…I would rid each and every one of those girls from my life if it meant having you all to myself.”

                He let go of my face and moved his hands down to my shoulders, grasping me back to reality, back to what was really happening right now. “Our bond is so much more than my bond to them, to anyone who works under me. I knew you were different than anyone else the day I saw you pointing that gun at my men. You didn’t even need to turn around because you proved to me, in that fraction of a second, you are your own person.

                “I haven’t felt as strongly as I do about any person, fuck any _woman_ since all this shit began! You bring some goddamn sense back into my life, as fuckin’ crazy as it sounds. And darlin’…I’d give my life for you if it meant you could go on surviving for me…”

I felt a weight lift from me. I couldn’t believe it because there it was. Right then and there, Negan gained another emotion, but I didn’t know what to call it. Perhaps it was a combination of different ones or one of his own creation. But whatever it was, I knew he wouldn’t share it with anyone else. It was ours, just for the two of us.

We smiled for each other and he leaned in to kiss me once more. A small dance of our lips and tongues was the last taste I had that night before we went our separate ways. I didn’t know when I was going to taste him again, so I savored each and every bit of him.

When we let go, he hesitated and masked it by kissing my forehead. Then, he cleared his throat and became his old self once again by saying, “Now…I want you to go right to fuckin’ bed when you get in there. You have a long day tomorrow, and god knows, you’re gonna have to get those assholes out of bed if you’re gonna get a head start.”

I laughed to myself as I leaned against my door. “Yes, boss,” I said, a smirk crossing my lips. He hummed in approval of my two-sided nickname for him, and began to walk away.

I looked away, grazing my fingertips across my chest and then lowering them to my lower abdomen. My hands and legs were already beginning to form small bruise marks of the chains. And my head swirled with bliss. I couldn’t believe all of this happened. It was like being inside of a dream that I was completely awake for. A scenario of being on the outside and looking in was no more. We shared in a very intimate act, one I never thought I could ever experience, and even if we never did it again, I had this one night. But one last thing crossed my mind…

                “Hey…” I called out to him. He stopped before turning the corner to the next hall, and looked back at me, “…everything has changed now, hasn’t it?”

He grinned, and gave a short laugh. “Darlin’…everything fuckin’ changed when I began flirting with you…and it’s never gonna be the same again. I just hope you’re fuckin’ ready.”

He winked at me, and turning the corner, he was gone for the night. His boots echoed in the hall until they were gone. I laughed quietly to myself out in the dark hallway, replaying what he said to me…

“Give me all you’ve got…” I said to myself, opening to door to my room and giving into my desires once more.

**Author's Note:**

> Please fell free to leave a comment! :D


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